Friday, August 04, 2006
mood: not happy
music: When It All Falls Apart- The Veronicas
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Actual Essay Answers...
Note: These aren't mine... I just have a thought shortage and therefore have nothing of my own to share... Except for the beparenthesised statements...
The Bible is full of interesting caricatures. In the first book of the Bible, Guinessis, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. One of their children, Cain, asked, "Am I my brother's son?"
(Talk about major incest...)
Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread which is bread made without any ingredients. Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten commandments. He died before he ever reached Canada.
(Bread w/o ingredients..? Now THAT'S Wonder Bread...)
Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but by another man of that name.
(So Homer didn't write himself but Homer did..?)
Queen Elizabeth was the "Virgin Queen." As a queen she was a success. When she exposed herself before her troops they all shouted "hurrah."
(Good for the troops...)
The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday.
(You mean he was born on his birthday..? Get out...)
Franklin discovered electricity by rubbing two cats backwards and declared, "A horse divided against itself cannot stand." Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead.
(Thankfully...)
Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent. Lincoln's mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands.
(Lincoln was a swell fellow, but to be born in a cabin he built with his own hands..? He must be God...)
The sun never set on the British Empire because the British Empire is in the East and the sun sets in the West.
(Interesting logic you got there...)
